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Our kitty is still missing. We've canvassed the neighborhood, posted and distributed more than 100 flyers, and talked to about 75 of our neighbors. We've looked under houses, behind fences, and called kitty kitty more times than I can imagine. No sign of her for two weeks. We're sad.

Work looms on Tuesday. I have two hour-long presentations this week for the Customer Service group. I have prepared for the second, but not the first. Silly me.

Hokey Smokes Bullwinkle, It's almost 2006! We plan to party (like school marms) to celebrate. Note to self: Drain pool enough that the water level is below the spillway into the hot tub. Hopefully we'll drink enough booze so that all the bottles will fit on one shelf again.

We watched Deathstalker 2 last night. This has got to be the funniest bad movie ever with ridiculous lines like, "Is Deathstalker your first or last name?" If you want to laugh, this is the movie to watch. Tonight we have Naughty Stewardesses 1975 (bow chicka bow wow) which promises to be a hoot. (get it, a "hoot", I crack myself up) so come on over if you are feeling like you have had enough sappy Christmas stuff.

Yes, it's true

Andy passed the test and got his driver license today. Woo Hoo!

Donations to the insurance fund can be made directly to Bob.
Cash only please.

PS He's out driving right now to celebrate.

Would you like cries with that

A memory crossed my mind the other day and it has been visiting me a few times since then. It is from the summer of 1996, when my father was dying. It was his last day. My memory is from the early afternoon as we had all gathered to be with him.

I remember that we were all taking care of him, sitting with him in his front room as he lay in a rented hospital bed. We all knew what was coming; a particularly painful loss of someone we loved so very much, someone we had all loved for a long time, someone we had so many memories with. We could clearly see the end of his life coming. It was a day-long moment of anticipation of the end. We could see things would change for all of us, in mundane and profound ways.

I remember this one moment in particular; in the midst of our growing grief, I looked out the window. It was sunny and warm. Then two neighborhood children rode by on their bikes, completely unaware of us and our situation. They were happy and joking with each other as they rode. It made me happy to see it. It was in that moment I realized so many things at once.

I realized how little things can bring you a great emotional distance in an instant. That even though you may be experiencing something immensely difficult, the lives around you continue undisturbed. That the status quo you had depended on so much was really only temporary, and that you would be better off accepting that fact than denying it.

Oddly, that look out the window had given me just what I needed at that moment; hope.

I've had a long time to reflect on this since then, and I think about that day often. I suppose that day really changed me. When I have a particularly hard day I think to myself, "That day dad died was pretty hard and life looked very bleak. But my life since then has been rich and full of so much joy. I wouldn't trade it for anything." That thought gives me hope, and the will to go on.

I hope for peace for you and the people you love in the coming year.

Very Merry Indeed

I hope your Christmas is going so well you are tickled pink.
Here's a bit of mine.

Remember that beard issue I was having...
It was so bad I was frowning.











I fixed that. But I still need a haircut!












So that caroling party was fun...









So fun it was blurry!












And one gift in particular was blogworthy...












All smiles.









Merry Christmas!

Real Estate

That's what Lucy always wanted for Christmas. I hope she gets it this year, and that everyone else gets what they want too.

We didn't get any real estate for anyone this year, but we did do mondo shopping here on The Last Day Before The Big Day. We were on three separate expeditions, saw Santa, had fast food, drove all the way to Campbell for a few items, called each other's cell phones. You name it, we did it in the name of shopping today.

We partied like school marms (you know how those hot school marms are when they take off their glasses and let their hair down, whoa!) until the wee hours last night. We lost count of how many people were here. It was more than 50. The party officially started at 5PM and the last guest left (OK fell asleep on the couch) at about 3AM. We sang lots of carols for the neighbors (about 15 houses or so) and we sounded pretty damn good. We ate like kings, or at least dessert barons, chatted endlessly, danced a little bit, had various adult beverages, and even hot tubbed. At one point all the ladies were talking about boobs, Erik and I just shut the hell up and let them.

We'll have to have some more parties soon because we have so figging many desserts left over. Nobody seems to take things home anymore, and they all bring food for twice as many of them as come in the door. This means you have two times the food you need. I'm not complaining though, because I really like pecan pie.

Now we are wrapping up the goodies and watching the obligatory Grinch Who Stole Crhistmas movie (Max the dog/reindeer, heart grew two sizes, Little Cindy Lou Who, etc.)

Shopping anyone?

Advanced Retail Therapy was applied topically to our colds. Sharon and I braved the rain and crowds for five and a half hours. We even found a few items! Jess went out for about five herself. Now we'll have to wrap a few items, but we'll probably wait till late, since the little doggie will probably want to help us unwrap things.

There are still a few things to get, luckily there are still three shopping days to go! Whee!

Time for a festive adult beverage.

Still life

We still have colds here. (The long wet weekend of fair really took a toll.) And there is still a holiday coming (soon). Still some shopping to go, and we still plan to have tea in the city. Then there is our kitty Shrimp who is still missing after six days. And I still definitely need a haircut, though I did overcome The Ridiculous Beard.

But we are still here, and we still intend to have tea, and holiday celebrations, and gifts under the tree.

And we still really hope Shrimp returns.

Here's hoping for stillness and peace for all of us and all of you.

Finally, I can shave off this ridiculous beard

Well, the last day of fair was more interesting than most by quite a bit. The storm overnight had ovewhelmed the roof drains and there was quite a bit of flooding inside. Lots of stuff got wet. One more reason to pack your belongings home nightly. Fortunately, the adult beverages were all spared. After getting things mostly dry, activities started like normal, except everyone was dressing outside of the soaked tent areas. (not as bad as it sounds, by now everyone has seen just about everything there is to see)

Then lightning struck the transformer that feeds the Cow Palace and took out the power about 20 minutes before we were supposed to open. Flashlights instantly became more useful. Most people were dressed so lots of us headed out into to lend umbrellas and serve tea to the hundreds of people in line who were waiting in the rain. The tea was supplemented later by muffins and some other goodies, all of which were handed out free for the asking as a thanks to the people waiting in the rain. Lots of people started fair carrying several pounds or water in their coats. The delay in getting people into fair and heavy turnout led to an hour long line, an hour after fair started. Yikes.

The power remained out for nearly two hours so the decision was made to extend closing time by an hour. The delayed opening thrashed play schedules, and led to some confusion and skipped scenes. Things settled down after a while and nobody got really bent about it. Due to the late closing, and immense demand, the Naughty French Postcards added a show. Later we found out that the people who saw the last show waited two hours(!) to get in. Holy crap!

Mysteriously, the gin bottle was empty when we went to make the 3PM martinis. hmmm.

The Monks interrogation went so well that it was hard to stop. I kept smacking Monks (Michael) with my gloves every time he contradicted me. This stopped even more people in the street. Then I would circle through the crowd all the while upbraiding Monks and demanding that he tell all. By the end we were surrounded by at least fifty people.

Immediately following the interrogation I went off to the back to back postcards shows. There were several substitutes, but both shows went smoothly. In the last show The Angels did a Charlies Angels pose, which was funny, but not as funny as when the The Youth of Athens slowly reached up one by one to grab David's naked butt. The audience howled. I got pictures. If you are really nice to me and send a pleading email, maybe I'll send you one.

Lots of goodbyes, then we packed the Suburban to the brim and headed home, exhausted.

Off the hook dude

As predicted, Naughty French Postcards' later show after closing was packed, really funny, and had more of what makes the show so popular: Naked Boobs. Mr. Dickens himself appeared onstage with a bare breasted corset model (nice work Anita), and we even got Scrooge up there shining in "headlights" if you get my drift. We even had Queen Victoria onstage. Jiminy Christmas, she has beautiful breasts.

It seems that some members of the cast had a few drinks prior to the show (shocking, I know) and the backstage cheering on was more enthusiastic. I'm sure that tomorrow night will be just as much fun.

The Fair was PACKED today, it seemed that everyone in the Bay Area was there, though it probably wasn't quite that many. People were still sick and missing, and tired, but all the scenes in Oliver went on schedule, with our Bet filling in as Nancy again. We have had more stand-in Nancys than real Nancy (Sarah). My voice was getting a little thin later in the day, and I think by tomorrow that Brownlow will sound more like Barry White than a British gentleman.

The end is near

If you don't go to Dickens Fair this weekend, you are out of luck dude. It promises to be a great time. The "last weekend effect" will be in effect. There will be the awards, that are sometimes regarded as stupid especially by the non-recipients. Of course Naughty French Postcards is nominated for best stage show. I predict a huge win, or at least a repeat of the giant throbbing crowds of people wanting to see the show.

We'll all be "Happy Christmasing" our way through the streets and playing our little in-joke pranks on each other. Saturday night at eight is the participants only NFP show. Something tells me that the script and or blocking will get enhanced somehow. I will pay close attention and report any discrepancies to you my loyal readers.

Between then and now we have another work/school day, and some laundry to do. Pretty exciting isn't it?

Tonight I have a cold and I am at the lovely coughing-up-junk stage. At least it's colorful. As soon as we can get the youngest flaming scroller into bed I plan to sit down with an adult beverage and a movie and forget that I feel lousy.

What the hell is he wearing now

I am "sobering up gradually" as my neighbor Franklin used to say. Franklin was really cool, even though he was in his mid eighties. He wore a beret, spoke a few languages, and had run a pump sales company. He passed away a few years ago. I miss him sometimes. He was damn funny.




Now that I have recovered from Monday and Tuesday night I can share the pictures.

Now it seems that Sharon has found out (somehow, I don't know how) that I am a fan of boobs. Go figure. Maybe Grace told her.

She got this card a few weeks ago, way before the Sunday incident that will now be known as "The Thirty Nipple Singalong".










Then out comes the cake. With nice full lusty festive pink umbrellas. I like the one candle effect. It makes it easier to say the number forty five since it reminds you less of a raging gasoline conflagration.




They were evenly sized, always a plus but certainly not required.







They tweaked almost as good as the real thing...










and they make a stunning ensemble, don't you think?







Now if you aren't laughing too hard to type will you pretty please share your comments with all of us. (yes, even you)

Oh yeah, Tuesday night we got together in full Dickensian costume with a three other folks to sing some Christmas carols at a preschool cookies and singing event. The kids didn't seem to really care all that much, but the parents thought it was great.

It's my party and I'll blog if I want to

You probably already know it's my birthday. And thank you to everyone who has been so generous thus far.

Third weekend of fair was pretty good. There were lots of patrons, lots of sick cast members, and lots of fun. The scenes in the streets have an unnerving variabilty to them, they never seem to go the same way twice. That said, they always feel unique and they seem to be well received. Hooray!

The postcards show appears to have grown to near legendary popularity. Patrons start lining up at 4PM, 90 minutes before the show, just to get in. It's crazy what people will do just to see some skin. We are seriously considering adding another show. There will already be an 8PM show for participants on Saturday.

Hearing that was my Birthday today the entire female cast of the show gave me a special happy birthday song, topless. There are fifteen of them, so that makes something like 30 nipples pointed right at me.

Here is what it looked like for them:

I'll let you imagine what it looked like for me.

Did I ever tell you

Did I ever tell you about my grandmother Betty? Of course both of them were named Betty because it seems that our family is bad with names. (My mom's given name was Sharon, Dad's name was Bob.) Anyway, now that both my grandmothers have passed on I can safely say that Grandma Betty (dad's mom) was my favorite.

She was really cool. You could tell her anything and she would never freak out. She was easy to talk to and brimming with the wisdom of someone way older than you. One school year she was working near my high school. I would go and meet her after school and she would drive me home. We would talk, I can't remember about what, but she always had unconditional love and kindness, even for her scruffy, long haired grandson.

I was a difficult kid. I had a terrible temper and I was often moody. I was always complaining about not having enough friends, especially the female sort. I got high a lot, and I really didn't apply myself to the schoolwork. (I suppose I have overcome at least some of this)

None of this really mattered to Grandma. She always gave reasoned advice. She didn't scold me. And no matter what, it was always abundantly clear that she loved me, and that she really cared about me the person, and not how I acted, or what I did or didn't do.

After she died (lung cancer, it was not pleasant, don't smoke) I found a little framed cardboard plaque in her things. I have always cherished it because it encapsulated her incomparable philosophy of how to love your loved ones. I have tried to take her advice whenever I could.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Muse-a-riffic

how

how can I tell you
how much it means
to have shared a million moments

to hear your laugh
to see your smile
to take your hand

in the space of decades
in the space between us
I have found an infinte fountain

love tumbling over the edge
nurturing all around
making a pleasant burbling
lulling us to sleep

waking we discover
a new day
a new dawn
a familiar life

carrying us together
from today
to an ever sweeter tomorrow

So long, Frank Lloyd Wright

I like that song. It is a little sad and haunting, but at the same time it celebrates someone's life and what they left behind for others. It ends with:

So long, Frank Lloyd Wright,
All of the nights we'd harmonize till dawn.
I never laughed so long
So long
So long

Sunday at Fair we had martinis, or as someone called them, "Colliertinis". We ran out of olives, and the glassware (OK paper cups) was decidedly far down the luxury scale. I had to keep going back to the Green Man bar to get ice, and we nearly ran out of vermouth. (I drank the rest last night in a single martini.) Maybe backstage at Fair is not the ideal place for mixed drinks...

Except that they were really quite popular. It seems that just about everyone there was a martini aficionado. I'll bring a shaker just in case someone else supplies all the other stuff. *hint*

None of you slackers faithful readers have commented on my excellent haunting and sad poem from Monday. Maybe that is just as well. Perhaps I should use my poetry powers for happy not sad. I'll see if I can get my muse on.

My good buddy Walter sent me this link on a site that shows you how to tie knots. I think it's cool.

The tree in my yard

falling leaves made me think about the passing seasons

standing

seldom seen
ceaselessly imagined
a future exists in all things

dimensions unknown
sheathed in gossamer
unexpressed until realized

we shine in sunlight
full of life
nurturing ourselves and kin
giving shaded comfort all below

our delicate lines and form
our colors and patterns
emblazon the sky
flutter in the breeze

yet

leaves withered and fading
fall through crisp air to cold soil
reminders of our bound fate

what will remain when we wither
falling away from our twig
where we shone brightly
and gave everything of our selves

standing beside myself
I wonder
what will remain

the tree casts a shadow at my feet
reaching to the clear sky above
sunlight streams across my face

Fair was lots of fun. You should come visit, unless you are already there of course.

Dew stars love yew

In rainy slow traffic this morning, a poem came to me.

dew

dew falls
while we slumber
in silence

emerging from the air
touching everything
nurturing life
in silence

distant stars fade
as daybreak comes
retreating
in silence

waking brings me near
you
in silence

your touch sends waves
beginning from nowhere
ending at my skin
in silence

yellow leaves fall from trees
in silence

the silence that waits
below our rushing current

I hope this brings you a moment of peace.