Sunday, March 20, 2005

Automatic Irritation Machine

OK Last post today, then I promise to get a life. More life, less blog.

I bank with a large chain bank whose identity shall remain shrouded, however their initials are WAMU. They, like all banks, have what we called in the 80's "coke machines" but we now call an ATM. I think that stands for Automated TELLER Machine. It takes the place of a teller in the bank branch. (are you still with me so far?)

Now WAMU has some of the friendliest machines you can imagine. They use super folksy, "How can I help you today my fine friend?" sort of language. This is already irritating enough since I have to read through actual dialog to get the message. So I put my card in that sucker and the first thing it does is ask me what language I would like to be chatted up in.

This is the part that kills me. How many times do I have to answer English for it to remember that I want to use English EVERY DAMN TIME. If a human teller who recognized me with as much precision as the machine does, asked me this question more than once I would have to say they were a moron.

Now don't get me started on the point of sale terminals intalled everywhere that all look alike and do exactly the same thing but have very different ways of going about doing it. Do I press enter first, then slide my card, push credit or answer the checker, sign the paper slip or the touch screen.... Fricken little machines piss me off.

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